I pride myself on being fantasy football savvy, however I always seem to come up short due to injuries, flukes or my starters just plain scrubbing it up. This year will be different though, there is an
air of confidence with my teams and above all else, I DID NOT drink a half bottle of vodka before the draft which was the annual custom and could be responsible for past years short comings…
I drew the 5th pick in my Big Money league which is made of up 20 guys with 2 divisions of 10 teams each getting their own pool of players to pick from. This is a coveted league and the waiting list is a mile long with no one considering giving up their spot any time soon. The only way that guys don’t keep their spot is either they lost interest (Brender) or you didn’t show up and pay your debts (Danny). Also the draft party that accompany’s this much touted occasion every year attracts on lookers and groupies from every corner of the planet. Two years ago was probably the best it has ever been. It would have made the photos from the end of the Hang Over 1 movie look like the Disney Channel. It truly is the must attend event of the year. That being said here is what I ended up with after the dust had settled and I am actually pretty pleased with everyone except a few that will only make me a genius in the end I’m sure.
- Michael Vick (I had the 5th pick so I had to take him and this is actually the 3rd time he’s my starter)
- Chad Henne (Don’t judge, just think about it for a minute and if you still don’t get it then move on. It’s too complicated for you anyhow)
- Marion Barber (I had to handcuff my 2nd pick Matt Forte and I took him in the very last round)
- Reggie Bush (I was a little premature with this pick, but in the end I think it will pan out because Kim Kardashian is completely out of the picture now and not making Reggie dumber with her very presence. So yeah I think Reggie is going to step up and make things happen.)
- DeAngelo Williams (Cam Newton can’t and won’t do it all by himself and Williams is still young enough to have another excellent season.)
- Michael Bush (I took him really late and while I do regret it now I do remember that I did it out of spite because I didn’t get RunDMC so now I expect him to get hurt and have his backup. This has lasting implications as you will see when you read below.)
- Matt Forte (Took him in the second round and Jay Cutler still sucks balls so I’m pretty confident I have an every week starter with him.)
- Santana Moss (I don’t remember what round I got him in, but it did deliver praise from my otherwise verbally abusive fellow fantasy drafters. People were worried because Beck is the QB in Washington, but I actually think he is good to go and Moss is the only guy worth throwing to.)
- Larry Fitzgerald (Got him with the 2nd pick which was a little scary to me as I have never taken a WR so early before, but he should be a pure point producer)
- Braylon Edwards (I was so shocked that he was still available that I thought I was stealing, Alex Smith sucks, but not enough to totally tank Edwards’ career)
- DeSean Jackson (I got him coupled with Vick and it makes me smile…)
- Julio Jones (I took him in the last possible round I could before I thought he would get snatched up and I stand by it. Roddy White is going to get double teamed right from the start to leave Jones open for the long bombs and this guy is make things happen this year.)
- Greg Little (I got him really late like in the 13th round and completely stunned the rest of the table, oh ye of little faith. Like I said they are a bunch of haters, just wait till I whip them this year on side bets.)
- Rob Gronkowski (Tight Ends start going in the 10th round for some reason, but I always pick up at least 3 different guys throughout the season so I think that I did pretty well with this pick.)
- Josh Brown (Got him with the last pick and proud to have a former Seahawk as well as a guy that kicks in a dome)
- Atlanta Falcons Defense (I may have had a few more attractive choices available to me at the time, but I made the play based on their division and honestly, there is no way you can just hang onto 1 defense throughout the whole season. Defenses need to be a weekly play if you want to win games.)
So all in all I am pretty happy with what I ended up with. And based on the amount of side bets I have this year I better be…
This year I also decided to get in on an office league because basically I was bored and I knew the competition would be soft. I drew 2nd pick and right from the start it was made clear that I was playing against far inferior fantasy aficionados.
- Tony Romo (When it came time to take a QB he was the best one left and it was the 4th round!!!)
- Eli Manning (Is there a better backup option?)
- Arian Foster (I had the 2nd pick and the scrub ahead of me took the still contract challenged Chris Johnson)
- Darren McFadden (This is what I was talking about when I said that Michael Bush pick would have lasting implications, but honestly it was a crime that he was still available when I got him as late as I did)
- Tim Hightower (I took him in like the 10 round so shut it…)
- Marshawn Lynch (I had to have a Seahawk on my team and in fact this is probably a great pick because Tavaris Jackson is a scrub and they will have no choice but to run.)
- Dez Bryant (I had the choice between him and Miles Austin and my reasoning is that I’m pretty sure that Dez Bryant is making more money thus Jerry Jones wants to get his money worths.)
- Vincent Jackson (I had the choice between him and Larry Fitzgerald and since I already got Fitzy in my other league I figured I would roll the dice with Jackson, plus I knew that Jake really wanted him.)
- Mario Manningham (I shit you not, I got him in the 11th round)
- Julio Jones (I had the chance to take him again and really there was nothing better looking on the board as far as WR’s go)
- Greg Little (He was there, I was bored, I know that sounds wrong…)
- Jeremy Maclin (I picked him based on my need for Michael Vick to achieve greatness this season.)
- Dustin Keller (13th Round)
- Jay Feely (15th Round)
- New Orleans Defense (14th Round)
I took the best of what was left to fill out my roster, but I mean damn!!! That is a strong team if ever there was one.
So there it is. You gotta agree that my almost cocky confidence is justified to a certain extent. I’ll be keeping a running account of my fantasy teams this season so if you want to be entertained just keep checking my Category every week and take the ride….
In both leagues my team is called the MFer’s which is actually a good way to describe them because when I start kickin ass and taking money that’s all the competition is going to be able to call my team. Those Mutha Fu……… I’m sure that all of you have a fantasy team as well so leave some wise or rather ignorant comments below and see what happens. I dare ya….